At Long Last, an Update

It’s been a while since I posted anything, so I figured it was about time to bring everything current.

The calls from mom have dropped off significantly.

At first, she was calling multiple times a day. It progressed to several times a week, and became less and less frequent. I have only gotten three calls (all on the same day) about two weeks ago.

Mom is ‘down’ from her manic high.

Not that she is better, just the energy that she has is down. The last several calls were at a relatively normal energy level, but the content was still pure vitriol.

Mom & Dad went to my first cousin, once removed’s wedding.

We were invited, and Mom wasn’t. I talked to my cousin about this a few months ago, and decided then that we wouldn’t be coming, given the likelihood that Mom would probably show up anyway. According to my cousin, Mom was able to maintain control on the day of the wedding, but it appeared to be a struggle. Anyone who knows Mom is familiar with that, as even during her manic times she is able to contain it for brief periods. The internal struggle really shows up on her face, and she has a few ‘nervous mannerisms’ that really give it away.

The next day, Mom was no longer controlled. She was extremely argumentative, and would start arguments with anyone over anything. The notable one that my cousin mentioned was over an apple core that was put in the wrong trash can.

Dad decided that it was time to go, and they left that evening.

Mom has our new house number.

An unfortunate accident with the caller-id dialed their number at the beach. She called back the next day and left a very brief message that ‘someone from this number called’ She has called back to leave a more typical message, but only once, and only one message-even though it was cut off. She called once after the wedding, but didn’t leave a message.

Mom is primarily at the beach, Dad is at the cabin.

Confirmed by my cousin, Mom drove to the cabin so that she and Dad could drive out to the wedding. Other than that, they don’t seem to be able to be around each other for any length of time.

Dad is not planning on leaving the cabin.

One of the calls that I got on my cell, as well as one of the calls at home, was from a new number. Judging by the area code, Dad has gotten a phone installed in the cabin.

The last month has been pleasant.

My wife and the kids no longer jump when the phone rings, they don’t ask to drive through parking lots to make sure that Mom or Dad’s car isn’t there, and the stress level in the house is just DOWN.

~ by namegoeshere on October 13, 2007.

2 Responses to “At Long Last, an Update”

  1. Hi, I am nearly certain that my mother is also bipolar. I haven’t read many of your blogs, only the most recent. If your mom has been this way for most of your life then you have probably been in the same place I am right now. I’m 23 years old and on the cusp of an explosion. I am asked to clean house, take care of my 11 year old sister, etc., while maintaining a full time job, an active social life, and nearly full time college career. Not sure how to handle the situation and have a stable relationship with my family in the future. Your blog is definatly enlightening.

  2. It has been my experience that the longer it goes, the worse it gets. My mother also fits the ‘collector of injustices’ model, and they either change or drive people off – there’s NEVER a middle choice. Basically, it boils down to when the people in their lives have had enough.

    Your situation is hard, because if you are living with them, you have additional obligations as members of the household – especially if you aren’t paying rent, and they are helping with tuition, etc. The best advice would be for you to start saving up now, so that it would be easier for you to leave when the time comes.

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